So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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