Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
