We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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