I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
