He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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