AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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