If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You're completely useless in the revolution.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
