you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
