She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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