I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
