I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
