i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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