I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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