There is no way he is gay with that hair.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
