Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
