You made me cry and you don't even care
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Just high enough for therapy.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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