Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
