she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
