But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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