I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize