i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize
