I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
