a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just gift wrapped bread.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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