im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
