how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I think my moral compass just broke
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
