Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
