32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
