3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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