Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Randomize
