gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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