Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
