He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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