It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
