I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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