WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
