It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
