And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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