Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
