Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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