This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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