it was like his penis was on wheels.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize