It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize