Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
