areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
