you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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