It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
