don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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