Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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