i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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