I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
